Just a week back I happened to be travelling to Delhi in the Duronto Express , which, I might as well mention, rocks. No seriously… it’s clean, comfortable, efficient and delivers right on time. In fact, me being of a marriageable age and not yet having found anyone suitable (*cough*), I was even considering, you know, talking to my parents about Duronto but then I knew technicalities - like not having a large enough mandapam for the pheras (circumambulations around the Fire God) and my mom’s objections – “Munde da rang changa nai hai” (groom’s complexion is not perfect) would get in the way. But then, who can blame her? No one aspires to have a fluorescent yellow and green and orange coloured son-in-law right… Seriously, what was DIDI even thinking???
Okay sorry, I deviated. Thing is, I spend most of my waking time on train journeys (which itself is roughly about 5% of my entire time on the train) looking out the window. And during this journey I realized that throughout the years, I have seen the exact same white-paint letterings splashed across the brown brick walls that often line the railway tracks – throughout MP, Bihar, UP and all the way to Delhi (I wouldn’t know about the southern states as I was deep in slumber while the train passed through them).
And the thought occurred to me, that if any foreigners or aliens from other planets were to traverse our beautiful country using the Indian Railways, they would immediately conclude that the biggest problem plaguing us is… no, not poverty or corruption or a huge population… It’s “gupt rog” (secret disease) – a term which I have learned encompasses a wide spectrum of disorders – right from STD’s to problems of “mardanagi” (manhood, you know).
All you can see painted on the walls is “Hashmi Dawakhana – Gupt rogon ke liye” (Hashmi pharmacy – for secret/hidden diseases). It's sometimes accompanied by an obscure "AMROHA" also. And I have been seeing this ever since I could read the Devanagari script and travel in trains. The greatest mystery to me was – WHERE exactly is this place?!?!? I mean, seriously, they paint the name all across but nowhere do they mention the address or contact number or anything. ADVERTISING FAIL, don’t you think? Or wait... maybe they are building a brand name by keeping the dawakhana as “gupt” as the “rog” it claims to cure?
This time, however, I saw some new additions. Like this new guy called “Doctor Raj” who even has some really innovative slogans you know. For example: “Jawani mein budhaape ka kya kaam?” (literally: What use of having old age in your youth?) Very inspiring really, don’t you think? :|
I had no clue that “gupt rog” was such an impo(r)tant (yes, yes, I know the other word also is spelt with an ‘e’ not an ‘a’) issue in India. If it is then the government need not really bother about the rising population, noe? Maybe they should just work on secretly closing down these secret pharmacies so that the population growth continues to secretly stay in control. Ahhh… NOW I get why the ads never mention the address… brilliance only, right?
P.S.: For more information, please Google... you can even find the exact address...
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